Lindsay Holmes
Healthy Living Editor, The Huffington Post
This goes out to anyone who is too hard on themselves. Being a human being is a difficult job.
You're going to make mistakes along the way. However, that doesn't mean
you should constantly berate yourself rather than praise yourself.
Below are some tangible ways to start treating yourself with compassion. Because you, above all else, deserve your own kindness.
Atsushi Yamada via Getty Images
1. Do some morning affirmations.
Start your day on a positive note. Recite a few affirmations to
yourself as you're getting ready, repeating them multiple times. Use
statements like "I am strong," or "I am capable." (Looking for some
other suggestions? Try these.) Repeat the phrase enough and soon you'll start to believe it.
2. Treat yourself to a day out.
Make a date with yourself and stick with it. Engage in an activity
that's designed to make you feel good, whether it's playing a sport,
going shopping or trying a meditation class. Try planning it in advance
for an added bonus: Research shows you're happier when you're anticipating an upcoming experience.
3. Give yourself permission to be alone.
Alone doesn't have to mean lonely; it's incredibly beneficial to your well-being. Solo time may make you more creative and can help you clear your mind. Experts also say spending time alone may help you be more productive. It's time to start enjoying your own company.
4. Exercise the word "no."
It may be a two-letter word, but it holds a lot of weight. There's something to be said about putting your needs first,
whether that means speaking up when you're feeling burned out, saying
no to an event you're uninterested in or cutting toxic people out of
your life. Sometimes the circumstances call for a polite decline -- and
that's more than allowed.
5. Try practicing lovingkindness meditation.
This specific form of the practice is focused on cultivating compassion. Research shows it can improve emotional intelligence and decrease your stress response.
"The place to look for the benefit of meditation is in your life, not necessarily in that formal period of practice,"
meditation expert Sharon Salzberg previously told HuffPost. "You may
not be sitting in bliss when you're meditating, but you'll find you're
different in the way you speak to yourself when you've made a mistake.
You're more resilient. You're kinder when you meet a stranger. That's
really why you meditate."
6. Write down your accomplishments at the end of the day.
Ditch the to-do list for a "done" list. It could be that you finally
turned in a work proposal or just the fact that you made some time for
the gym. Research shows that taking stock of what you're grateful for
can improve your well-being. When you focus on the good, you don't have room for the bad.
7. Be kind to someone else.
Pay it forward: Buy someone a coffee, donate to your local charity or
just make a loved one dinner. Generosity is cyclical. Studies suggest
that expressing kindness toward others makes you happier, and happiness makes you kinder.
8. Talk to yourself like you'd talk to a friend.
You wouldn't call a loved one a failure, fat or stupid, so extend the
same courtesy to yourself. Positive self-talk is powerful. The more you
learn to appreciate the person you are -- flaws and all -- the happier
you'll be. Research shows self-acceptance is key to a happier life, but it's a habit people rarely practice.
9. Stand in the mirror and give yourself a compliment.
Your brain has a tendency to reflect on the negatives, like that bad
hair day or that unsightly breakout. But here's a newsflash: You are not
your reflection.
Show a little kindness to yourself by standing in front of the mirror and not only calling out the positives that you see, but pay yourself a genuine compliment about what you don't see. Are you a great listener? Are you a loyal friend? Those are the qualities that truly matter.
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